i dug out
all of the old photographs
i have left of you
ripped them up
and set them ablaze
in an ashtray
in my bathroom sink.

i had to stop
when the smoke detector went off
in the background
best coast wailed,
"when i'm with you
i have fun..."

and now
i feel nothing.

the only photos
i couldn't bring myself
to rip
or burn
were the polaroids
and i folded up
that old daniel johnston poster
and stuck them deep inside that
and the flyers
from the shows we went to
they're all shoved in the bottom
of my picture box.

i hope i forget about them
and never have to find them
until i'm happy again
and i can look back and think,
"what was his name again?"

but i won't even care
because i'll be on a whole new
planet
wrapped in silver
gold. warm
blankets in the wintertime
keep me warm
but someone else's feet
replace my socks.
someone else's
essence
replaces my thoughts
of the person
who's face
is now the smoke
in my lungs
that i will eventually
breathe back out.
and never breathe in
again.